Bumble Bees in my mum’s Garden

Accompanying YouTube video (Click to view)

“Bumblebees are key factors in our wildlife. If they disappear many of our plants will not bear fruit”

David Attenborough (FRS).

Reading my Title ‘Bees in mum’s Garden’ gives you a strong hint as to the theme of this evening’s Post.

My mother is a keen flower gardener, all her borders are a riot of colour as are the many plant pots situated on the paved areas. As you can see from my video I visited Saturday afternoon and as I wandered around her peaceful garden I noticed wild bees hoping from flower to flower so reminiscent of helicopters and by chance I had my Samsung tablet with me so photographed the bees as the went about their work, they came out quite well don’t you think and I was really impressed the bees gold hoops, wings and legs are clearly visible and please don’t ask me to name the flowers, because my fingers are definitely not green!

With a little internet research I’m pretty sure the bees in my photographs are named small garden bumble bees though I’m no expert, the one fact I do know is bees could possibly be the most important insect to visit your garden.

Here’s the natural history lesson! 😀

Bees visit flowers to collect nectar and pollen, which they use as food for themselves and the larvae in their hives or nests. By moving from flower to flower, they are vital pollinators of many garden and wild flowers. Insect pollination is essential for the cropping of most fruits and some vegetables, there are several hundred different types of bee resident in the British Isles.

As a rule of thumb your garden should provide bee-friendly flowers that are rich in pollen and nectar which bees can easily access from spring until late summer, this ensures there’s a good supply of pollen at all the crucial times.

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Video featuring my mum’s garden, a bumble bee post will follow.

I’ve just been notified this is Post 100! 

My apologies Hester, the video above is from my tablet and in my opinion the quality’s much better than before (compare to my Blenheim pics) but I FORGOT to speak up, the reason why is my mum’s neighbour was in her garden!

Good morning from sunny England, Now a message to the lovely people who read my Posts 🙂 lol you’ll understand by now, ‘sure as eggs is eggs’ (a saying of ours) you’ll know for certain todays post will NEVER be the same as it’s previous, not by devious design mind, nothing deceitful, I hope you think me a gent it’s just the way I’ve always ‘blogged’.

The video above has been uploaded onto my YouTube, as always, and features a panoramic view of my mother’s rear garden, a typical English suburban housing estate where each house has a small plot of land, some grow vegetables and flowers some seed the soil into lawns for the children to play on.

© Andrew.

Erotica. She let me cum……… (the ending)

Original story written by ©Andrew (Note intended to be read by mums dads adults, I can assure if you’re under age 16 you’ll be BORED witless, I ain’t joking! Go 😀 play a computer game and have more fun instead. Thank you 🙂 )

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Continuation from She let me cum in her mouth pt3 and here’s how my story ends! But first setting the scene, Chantelle and I are naked in her London Flat: 

‘My body sinking into warm duvet and dutifully followed by my mature horny babe her wetness flowing out of her vagina like water drops slipping down glass in a rain storm, and like a reluctant virgin about to be deflowered on her wedding night she lay down beside me.’

Now the final part!

 ……………….a beautiful mature lady……if a little overweight! 

A middle aged tiredness brought us to our senses, we paused breathless our bodies breaking from their embrace, then Chantelle sitting up supporting herself on one elbow, looking through tousled naturel blond hair draped across false eyelashes, quietly says:

“You like kissy kissy don’t you!” whilst wiping lipstick from her mouth with a wet wipe bought to clean penis’s of their pussy juice…………..and before you ask, she was English white and lived in Norfolk………….as for her Flat? Our emailing? Long story 😀

“Andrew sweetie, roll over honey and I’ll massage your back!”, like a puppy dog I dutifully roll over as she draws her right thigh over as if to ride me! (Couldn’t resist that!)

Chantelle is a mature sexy goddess of a woman, very feminine a girly girl type, mind you ALL women are beautiful goddesses to me, so go on force yourself, try to picture a natural blonde sitting just below my ass cheeks her legs straddling my thighs, her knees firmly squeezing my thighs in vice like grip, and joy of joys feeling her soft shaven vagina lips dripping wet pressing into my peachy ass.

If truth be told I think she fancied a rest from kissing cuddling and rolling, now able to sit up upright, feeling the discomfort from nursing a bad back ease (I’ll explain later) and I should say she wasn’t a light woman, not overweight either, but I certainly felt her sitting on top of me, her weight straddling my thighs like a female horse jockey aloft her mustang steed, Chantelle telling fascinating tales of her exciting life, me quietly listening captivated and all the while her fingers kneading massaging my tense shoulders, then she stopped suddenly, my tired muscles released from tender dextrous touch, her still and motionless silence only broken because she must have glanced down at my peachy ass cheeks, then completely out of the blue she says,

“You know Andrew you’ve a fab looking ass for a man your age”

Are you at all curious why Chantelle nursed a bad back, do you know what 😀 , after all I’ve written about visual images burnt into my consciousness and virtual tape machines in my brain recording intimate conversations 😀 I cannot remember why she had a bad back, No idea except she suffered from one, perhaps she didn’t fancy the idea of sexual gymnastics or rolling round that double bed having mad passionate love making, wasn’t for me either, nope seemed we were both content with kissing cuddling massages and chatting, fine by us both.

Laying on soft duvet, legs wide apart she knelt between my open thighs holding my hard cock in her right hand rhythmically rubbing my shaft and foreskin up and down, bringing me to near point of orgasm and skilfully understanding when to stop me ejaculating……. one talented woman was Chantelle she gave a mean hand job! My body squirmed and wriggled under the power of her firm tight grip, me with one arm stretched out, palm of my hand grabbing one natural firm breast all soft and round, once I squeezed so tight a nipple showed between thumb and forefinger and she momentarily lost her rag yelling,

“fucking hell Andrew don’t do that!”

I love the intimacy of a woman wanking me off and in my experience a woman enjoys the sex act just as much as men, please tell me if I’m wrong. I so look forward to the squeal of delight when I shower her breasts with beads of sticky cum, or as Chantelle did now come the time she lowered her head mouth open inches above the tip of my penis, all the while working my hard member with her hand, guiding controlling my soon near climax, my carnal pleasures now heightened because joy of joy I knew what this angel of mercy (nurse lol) was about to do for me now. Crimson lips open hovering above the purple tip of my phallus, me laying on her bed arms stretched out like a crucified Jesus Christ, Chantelle kneeling dutifully waiting between my wide open thighs, then my back arched upward a thrusting spasm ejaculating warm silk milk across her tongue and deep into her throat, pumping until I could cum no more!

Finally my body all spent she pulled her head back releasing my cock from her drooling wet mouth, gazing at me, parted those glossy red lips wide open, poking her tongue out revealing my pool of cum, she tossed her head back gargling my cream in the back of her throat, then swallowed the sticky liquid down in one…. mascara running from her watering eyes choking as my gooey cum coated her windpipe, but she enjoyed it and with love in her eyes she licked her lips beamed a wide girly smile……….and said!

“I only swallow for good boys 😀 now pass me that wine!”

The End.

(I hope you enjoyed my tale, and for those readers who’re wondering “Fact or Fiction?” All I’ll say is my story’s a ‘blend’ of truth and fantasy, 😀 and a few comments I’ll reveal which.)

© Andrew (next one’s features back garden flowers)

Erotica, She let me cum……… pt3

An Original story written by ©Andrew 

(Continued from pt2)

yy99llllll……………..became friends, our email relationship had progressed to a point where one sunny afternoon in July, and not so long ago, I found myself in Chantelle’s London Flat ‘boudoir’ standing naked at the foot of a double bed inside her warm cosy bedroom, more precise I’d undressed totally nude only my hard cock to keep me company, holding it’s shaft in my hand a sort of comfort blanket, gently stroking calmed this horny guy excitedly anticipating heavenly pleasures only this voluptuous blonde could give me,

Oh did I say she was age 40!……………..Then through open door she walks this middle aged blonde goddess, with a big bum tight waste pert high round boobs, all dressed up as a nurse (backpage pic) in white mini-dress, her wide open cleavage as you’ve never seen in your life before.

We said hello, exchanged pleasantries and suddenly feeling quite emotional I moved to face her less than a metre apart, then peeking down her plunging neckline I moved closer still unbuttoning her all the way down, opening the white pinafore then slipping the soft cotton fabric backward over her shoulders, I remember standing transfixed dumb founded unable to move my eyes surveying up and down her pink naked body my brain trying to process this vision of beautiful naked womanhood. Chantelle has the firmest roundest most shapely breasts I’ve squeezed in my entire life, high and round about one handful. Then I place my hands above her hips pulling her body to me one final time, we embrace tightly, our heads along side each others, her baby soft cheeks pressing into my twelve hour stubble, her hushed voice saying,

“So Andrew what shall we do this fine afternoon?”

My heart beat slowed to normal, phew I thought to myself ‘we’re going to be ok, we’re going to have fun’ and completely relaxed I replied,

“Well in your email you said I could cum in your mouth and babe that sounds fine to me”, she giggled winked and said “not so fast honey, I want you inside my mouth but first some kissy kissy” and with that she grabbed great handfuls of my plump buttocks, her head leaning back giggling like the little girl Chantelle really was!

Then I kissed Chantelle, passionately, tongues deep inside the each other’s mouth, wet with saliva entwining dancing all you readers being aware there’s no body part more sensitive than the tongue………..we must have kissed for twenty minutes, you think I make this sh*t up? 😀 Nope, our embrace became tighter, bodies touching ever more intimate, my hands moving from hips to squeezing fat buttock cheeks then back to her hips again, we kiss ever more passionately, devouring, breathless into each other’s mouths, even red lipstick smeared across our lips, I thought her face appeared amusing until I saw my reflection in a mirror later.

I’m a boob man through and through, large or small pert or sagging, means no odds to me as long as I can play with them, suckle on a nipple, drink like a new born babe then I’m happy and satisfied. What does breast milk taste of? I’ve bottle fed my nephew with J’s own milk craving to suck just once but I didn’t!

I longed to touch Chantelle’s breasts, but our bodies were tooo close! “Loosen up girl!!!” I said momentarily pulling away!

We continued to kiss, two naked silhouettes drawn together, her arms wrapped less tightly around my waist pulling holding me against her, her warmth touched every part of the front of my body, such an affectionate embrace of two lovers who’d been here before. Aroused, sexually excited I struggled to slip my hand between our bodies so I could grope her firm breasts, but I’d been a worried man when we first cuddled, I could feel my aroused hardness pushing between her inner thighs, the pressure making the base of my purple bell end tingle, thousands of nerve endings electrified and I thought to myself ‘what if in my excitement I’d entered her, my now horizontal phallus pushed deep in to her wet vagina pressing against her womb, throbbing engorged with blood, hell I may have spontaneously orgasmed sticky cum inside, consensual mind, is involuntary semen exchange rape if she hadn’t expected my phallic explosion! But not to worry I missed her pink gash, I don’t much like fucking anyway but all’s well 🙂 my engorged phallus slipped between Chantelle’s warm squeezed thighs, briefly stroking wet labia lips, mind you hers did flap about a bit, we kissed and kissed and deep French kissed some more, many a minute passed before we spoke again.

I guess with tired lips and aching jaws we must have mutually sensed it time to stop the wonderful French, so backing away I moved on to her bed, body sinking into warm duvet and dutifully followed by my mature horny babe her wetness flowing out of her vagina like water drops slipping down glass in a rain storm, and like a reluctant virgin about to be deflowered on her wedding night she lay down beside me. We embraced affectionately then as tight as before, gently rolling over each other for what will be one of the more fantastic afternoons of my life, as for her? She always said she had fun but this time she wanted something different. 

So lovely readers 😀 we leave our two lovers for the moment, embraced facing each other kissing on the lips, all very tender and motionless.

:/

For months previous to first meeting we chatted time to time via email, Snapchat FB Twitter and Skype aren’t for me, aren’t for us, todays young internet generation can’t comprehend how two people can ‘play’ without help of social media and tell me where’s the harm daily writing to each other as our forbears would have? Do children today understand that written exchanges between lovers go as far back as Jane Austin times?

Who?

Love letters sent between lovers possessing intriguing codes secrets and hidden messages keeping each other guessing even after the letter is returned to it’s envelope, I enjoy email, it f*cking stresses me out mind, many a time I’ll press send then panic with questions of, ‘did I express myself as I intended? Oh God have I offended her? Worse still upset?’ Not to worry, more often than not my replies made her smile even laugh sometimes. Long ago I came to a decision not to on-line date, women have told me the horror stories, explained how scams work, perhaps I’m a cynic, for one thing is sure I know there are lots of lonely ladies out there, perhaps I should give it a try, honesty is one aspect of WordPress that is plain to see, the blogger you are reading is bearing her soul, truthful and trusting, me also because not a single word is a lie………………come to think of it perhaps on my old blog I did say I’d done anal, that must have been some weird dream because I haven’t been there…………..yet, enough and I’m SORRY!!!!!

Returning to naked me and Chantelle our bodies near joined as one tenderly rolling atop her double bed, me luckiest man alive hugging a beautiful mature lady……if a little overweight!

To be continued in my fourth and final part

©Andrew ❤

Erotica. She let me cum……… pt2

Original story written by ©Andrew

(continue from pt1)

feb2016 (1) …………………. this romantic tale comes in four parts, hope you read part 1, btw the naughty part begins in part three but how I came to meet Chantelle is important to my story.

So no sex yet!

Keep patient hopefully you’ll find it pretty hot stuff!

………..this romantic tale took place (perhaps it’s fiction 😉 ) after I’d deleted my first blog and for twelve months I’ve purposely shied away from writing about my sex life, number one because no one is interested, number two I find reading sex blogs tedious tho I love reading erotic poetry, but sex blogs lack soul to the point I haven’t Followed one in over a year and number three I haven’t layed a woman in ages! True that.

And I’m NOT showing off! 

So now you understand why I’ve refrained from tales of sex on this blog, apart from Helen’s striptease of course, but I didn’t masturbate while watching her breast examination so that doesn’t really count! I’ve banned myself from talking sex but for one time only I’m going to re tell a true story……. 😉 then again this may be fiction 😉 …… did you know there are awards for badly written erotic fiction………..I could Google it but can’t be assed b’cause it’s late!

Okay LOL I’ll attempt a dirty story………………. Setting the scene, one sunny afternoon several month’s ago I found myself inside a Flat in Canning Town………… that’s London to you………more precisely in a bedroom waiting for a mature woman, just how I like em!

:/ Ok ‘I found myself in a Flat’ isn’t a great beginning, let me start again by saying Chantelle and I had emailed too and fro for many weeks before first meeting, not a dating site mind let’s just say dating isn’t entirely the point to the particular chatroom we frequent, wouldn’t you LOVE me to reveal it’s name, afraid not! Ok why not there’s this website called ‘backpage’ where you place an advertisement when want an item, let’s say for example a wardrobe no let’s say sex instead and you’ve guessed internet users looking for sex go to ‘backpage’ to find the look of someone they like, there’s a message board for corresponding, telephone numbers are exchanged and then if the guy likes the look of the woman and the woman likes the look of the guy AND they both believe and trust each other they meet up! Easy as NO it’s a frigging minefield of scammers liars raving nutcases, but if you trust your sixth sense, implicitly, use common sense ‘backpage’ can be fun BUT lol you won’t ever find your soul partner and live happily ever after! 😦

NO MONEY CHANGES HANDS!!!!

Do I need to explain anymore or have you fathomed how ‘backpage’ works? Put it this way you’re not buying a wardrobe in the furniture section!

God I could explain the point to ‘backpage’ and how it works ALL evening, lol let’s cut to the chase, one evening many months ago whilst scrolling through ladies pictures I happened across a forty year old divorcee called Chantelle, I clicked her thumbs up then she looks at my profile and clicks my thumbs up and then both being signed up members, how ‘backpage’ makes money, we both view each other’s profile pages normally hidden from view and importantly each other’s ‘photographs’ and when I say photographs I actually mean filthy near pornographic nude selfies, all tasteful and legal mind, well ours were on the whole tasteful, so we chatted on the message board, became friends then one sunny afternoon in July………

5
Andrew

Sample taken from my profile page!

To be continued in part 3 then part 4.

Andrew 🙂

 

Erotica. She let me cum……… pt1

Original story written by ©Andrew

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……………then again perhaps I didn’t cum in her mouth and this is a fictional tale.
 
I remember sexy times with ladies as vivid images burnt across my mind, I remember conservations as if my brain possessed an old style tape recording machine, mental powers alone able to press a virtual reality play button whilst sitting on a commuting bus, gazing out the window daydreaming and bored………..Jeez there’s so many unforgettable conversations to replay then again some deeply regrettable, perhaps this is a privilege only bestowed upon persons using public transport? I really mean that, an opportunity tailor made for talented bloggers unlike me. (Ahh, but true!)

Yes you did read that right, public transport! It’s a question of time my lovelies solitary boredom feeds a wandering mind! Good that. 

Sometimes I glance around people sitting on the top deck going to work, all doing very little, a few talking in hushed tones and not many read or listen to music which might surprise you, perhaps the jolting swaying down country lanes puts people off I know it does me. Most are silent deep in thought gazing out the windows, and I’ll find myself sitting there watching faces so curious, wondering what conversations and life stories they are playing back on their virtual tape machines? Arguments, happy times, last night’s telly or daydreaming sexual encounters they’ve had or wished they’d had, that pretty Sunday School teacher, a large bust so out of proportion for her slender figure, morning worship and I’d sit in the pew behind staring at the back of her bra, fantasies of what wonders the lingerie held up.

How many of you have the opportunity to sit alone each day, calm quiet with only your thoughts for company and if you’re really unlucky, two hours each day. Squandered precious time, Yes of course it is!

The deck of a bus holds forty adults all sexes and ages trapped constrained by passengers sitting next to them, all with important places to go, yes I’d agree if you said self inflicted solitude is dull and boring, if that’s what you’re thinking, but I’m here to tell you commuting to work by bus or train is one of life’s opportunities to let your imagination run riot, here comes the naughty bit.

No word of a lie many a time I’ve been travelling to work on a bus with an attractive young lady sitting next to me, I ain’t no perv mind but if you said voyeur, I am. I have been known to surreptitiously keep half an eye on her legs if she’s wearing a dress or skirt, you see when a lady sits you’ll know her skirt hem slips towards her hips, gliding across smooth black nylon tights revealing her shapely thighs squeezed tightly together, pussy lips closed tightly shut, her hem line resting distance dependent on the skirt’s length to begin with. Inconsequentials such as skirt length can make or break a bachelors day, if the lady works for a bank I’ll see her knees and little else, if she’s a College student (age 16+) chances are her skirt hem stops inches below her soft cotton gusset, knickers filled with forbidden fruit tasting moist and sweet on a guys tongue………………well pussy’s always taste sweet to me!

Where was I? Commuting to work by bus! Hmm before becoming side tracked by thoughts of female legs I hope I’ve explained that far from being boring quiet solitude, the rhythmic side to side rocking of a bus allows one’s imagination to race with perhaps dreams of conquests past……………………or then again what to cook for the children’s tea tonight………. you pays your money you takes your choice……….. and those of you who blog, maybe you’re a little envious? Nah Andrew don’t be silly, the gift of time is ticking away.

Returning to me seated next to a young lady, when opportunity permits gazing at her smooth thighs (student not banker), and bare in mind commuting etiquette necessitates let’s call rule number one, that two human bodies never knowingly touch other, not even the slightest of contact’s……. do and you’ll get an evil glare, slip a hand between her thighs and you’ll get five years inside! ……..I’ll reach the end of this bloody ‘hosiery’ tale if it takes all evening!!!! Time to time I’ll peek at her black tighted thighs, highly erotic and turning me on but not exciting enough to give me a full hard on, the young lady quite oblivious unless she herself looks down aware blood is engorging my groin causing a hump in my jean crotch.

Little does she know, her oh so sexy legs recall memories of pleasant afternoon’s spent in bed with females of my own, my now perfumed neighbour overpowering my consciousness. I wait in eager anticipation when a bus stops hoping for a pretty lady to sit next to me, clutching her handbag drawn into her tummy and if I rest my elbow on the window seal, support the weight of my head via hand and forearm, I can twist my torso slightly and watch her out the corner of my eye without her noticing, I hope, and when the bus rides a bump I see her heavy bust bounce or jiggle if she’s little tits, really lucky if her collars open I may even see the hint of a bra cup, that quickens my breath and makes my heart beat a little faster, a vapour of cheap perfume wafting my nostrils, bras boobs black tighted thighs give rise to a harder phallus…………even came in my boxers once, wonder if she noticed………so ladies if you’re sitting on a train next to a guy don’t assume he’s contemplating the weather! 😉

Got there in the end! Am I a naughty boy? :/ Or am I worse?

I could write a book of tape recorded stories in my brain, oh I already have, they’re all on my first blog LONG ago deleted………….and why is a long story! But in hindsight I’m pleased I kept no copies, so beware all you poets, story tellers and bloggers, keep copies, back up your files! 

The heavenly tale I’m soon to tell, remember you still have an opportunity to run, all……..

To be continued, and I ain’t deleting this time! 1000 words done 2000 to go.

© Andrew ❤

Walking in the rain!

I have both good news 🙂 and bad news 😦 for you.

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Good news first, for the past two years I’ve been uploading videos onto my YouTube all filmed by my cheap and cheerful digital camera, however you’ll agree the picture quality is pretty poor. THEN yesterday evening it suddenly dawned on me I have a Samsung tablet with a great camera, taken me 8 months to figure that one out ffs. 

Now the bad news, the weather across Great Britain is awful, by that I mean it’s rained constantly for two days, dry ditches are now running streams for heavens sake, yay I have a great quality video camera however if I go outside to film Oxfordshire’s fantastic Countryside I get absolutely soaked!

But like the trooper I am, I braved the rain just for my WordPress (absolutely true) filming the video below and my narration pretty much explains all, listen to the rain………

It’s only uploaded to test the camera’s picture quality so perhaps don’t watch. Bit boring.

Listen to that rain! I only wish I’d remembered I owned this Samsung when I visited beautiful Blenheim Palace………….. oh well we men aren’t the sharpest tools in the box!

If you have any British friends you’ll know we don’t half moan about the weather, it’s either too hot and sunny, or too wet and cold, mind you talking about our weather is a great ice breaker when you first converse with someone you don’t know.

Consequently due to the rain this isn’t the post I hoped to publish, I had planned to visit a local Abbey and walk the Cotswolds, unfortunately due to the fact Holly and I were soaked to the skin we settled for a short walk closer to home………… 🙂 Holly didn’t appear to mind!

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Not to worry, better luck next time! 

© Andrew

 

Breastfeeding on a train and I’m quite frankly disgusted!

Ahh 😀 I bet that Title caught your attention………..perhaps you’re curious “What’s gone and upset Andrew this evening?” ……and yes I agree my previous post was a little self indulgent but a little introspection is fine in small doses, re reading two months from now might be interesting?

I do enjoy these posts where I just write honestly and freely!

If you’ve read my naughtier posts and think I’m sexist read on, if not skip to the photograph below.

(The following morning on the 21st, I edited replaced the word misogynist with sexist, WOW I never realised misogynist is defined ‘A hater of women’, God, I don’t think any reader thinks I hate women…………. hmm 😀 sexist? You decide)

………..very occasionally I’ll contemplate the themes and content of my previous 92 posts, I did that the other day and re revisited one or two of my saucy posts and it dawned on me my language towards women could be seen as sexist, I’m not, I enjoy the company of women and I have utmost respect for the fair sex, but you have to realise since age 16 I’ve worked in male dominated environments and rightly or wrongly a blog allows us the freedom to write how we wish, within reason, or what’s the flipping point? ………… In truth I’m like all men, I’m a naughty boy at heart and writing ‘explicit’ posts makes me smile nothing more……… and anyways one overseas lady follower says 😀 she skips my naughtier posts which is fine………….a shame really b’cause they’re such fun to write.)

Returning to my frankly bizarre inflammatory Title, let me make clear I’m fine with a woman feeding her baby breast milk so as to keep the infant alive and grow up healthy.

Now look at this viral photograph circulating on Twitter the News and all other social media…………the lady is Bryony Esther and she’s feeding daughter Saffron 🙂

 

BreastfeedingI truly wish I’d been a seated passenger on that train travelling through the South of England because this  is a truly sad photograph, if I was one of those guys with blurred out faces I would have given up my seat and insisted the young lady sat down to feed her baby, but no this story is World News because none of those men did and worse still the owner of the bike is sat in a priority seat for disable, pensioner or anyone else in need……………….. fucking selfish bastard!!

In her words “Despite ‘hovering’ near the priority seating area no-one offered to move and instead began sniggering”.

On all levels this is such a sad photograph, a young lady with upset in her eyes and many selfish grown men lacking all humanity and common decency and I hope their mums sisters girlfriends and wives get to see this selfie ‘snapped’ by Bryony herself!

I’m certainly no angel and I’m not looking for plaudits or praise, but do you ever find yourself reading a story watching a News item and thinking ‘I wish I’d been there’ so I could do the right thing’………….such a sad photo! Why are people such assholes?

As for breastfeeding in public, don’t get me started, I’ve been there when my sister-in-law has breast fed one of her three sons in public, what’s the big deal? Why do people complain? I while ago I was walking towards the centre of Oxford and passed by a lady seated at a pavement table outside a restaurant, and as I walked by I remember thinking to myself how beautiful is that, what is more natural than a woman feeding her baby.

© Andrew

 

 

Sunday Roast with Mum. St. Peter and his blessed gates!

A work colleague and very good friend once said to me “Andrew the trouble with you is you think tooo much”, and do you know what, the more I learn and the longer I live I’m convinced overthinking is part of a human being’s DNA, you cannot change the way you are genetically programmed can you. A thought crossed my mind the other day, I do hope readers don’t think my posts are taken from my old blog or worse still penned years ago! Nope, every clumsily written Post is idly dreamt up at work and drafted a day or so before publishing. I’ve been thinking of stopping for a while, don’t get me wrong I adore WordPress and I WILL MOST definitely continue reading the bloggers I follow because I enjoy them tooo much, the only downside is their talented use of language and composition shows up my inadequacies as a writer or perhaps it’s a lack of ideas? You see my life is empty and uncomplicated when I should strive and strive again to fill it with joy, I can’t help thinking my inability to meet a female, become friends, marry or partner up will haunt me till my dying day………… but that’s ok, that’s life I guess, I have a LOT to be thankful for but I get this awful dreaded premonition over thinking may have screwed my whole life up! Come the fateful day when I reach those pearly gates and St. Peter says “So Andrew what have you done with your life my friend?”  I’ll answer “Not a lot Peter, you see I squandered it, I wasted that most precious of gifts time itself” and yes St. Peter will be angry, I’m sure it’ll be anger and not pity such a disgusting trait feeling sorry for oneself. Yep I fucked up big time and I never did get to have sexual intercourse in a car, that’s a big regret, love making in a car may not seem that important to you but it’s a major rights of passage between apprentice engineers electricians and practical young men, God the stories and b*llsh*t I’ve had to listen to lunch break after lunch break, lurid tales lavished by thirty of the greatest seventeen year old lads you could ever hope to meet, amazing disclosures explaining the complexities of getting a girls knickers off in the back seat of his first car, let alone the mountain that is giving the young lady a right good seeing to, surely position cowgirl in a mini metro is a physical impossibility? Or maybe a BJ is nearer the truth 😀 some of life’s more memorable stories are born of comradery. I’ve slept with quite a few women in my life, fourteen to be exact (is that above average?), but casual internet relationships and the like don’t count do they, (perhaps I’ve been far tooo honest here this past two years, distasteful even, disgusted readers). Where was I, yes true love is finding a good woman, however there’s another popular definition of love favoured by many bloggers, namely ‘soul mates’, turns out finding your soul mate is love’s Holy Grail, no? Perhaps you’ve been reading the wrong blogs then, but seriously finding one’s soul mate happens 🙂 ………… where was I? Yes that flipping St. Peter……….perhaps come my fateful judgement day, it’ll finally dawn on me I should have spent my life believing in a God instead of being so dismissive of religion and spirituality, would a belief in a higher being, a supreme creator have cured me of my apathy, regrets and thoughts of missed opportunities, squandering gifts God given, not taking risks may have cost me dear? In my defence the odd lucky break would have been appreciated, I’ve never fully come to terms or coped well living with my drug resistant epilepsy this past twenty five years, not withstanding ‘the however many years that still remain’, that’s the real killer……………………….. :/ trouble is I don’t believe in a God, hmm this is a very self indulgent post but hey my blog and all that. For what it’s worth I’m convinced the real point to life is wait for it! The meaning of life ‘is to love and be loved’, simple as, without love living is meaningless and yes pointless, you may just as well be dead because your soul will be. My brother has a wife with children, I try not to envy him but increasingly I kinda do 🙂 they’re such fabulous witty fun loving boys, the family all love each other and I’d bet M. and J. (parents) don’t wake up on a morning and throw the towel in, they can’t can they! There’s mouths to feed, clothes to pay for and they’re both blessed with love and fun that comes with having children.

Best stop there 🙂

So 😀 after making clear my posts are original and new, today’s short tale is taken from Sunday last and I’d agree it’s not the most riveting of reads lol, however it’s honest to the core….and brief 🙂

The dinner plate of delicious looking food below is often referred to as Britain’s traditional English Sunday roast dinner, and that particular one in the photograph was captured at my mother’s last Sunday lunch time, but please note the choice of meat can vary, perhaps pork chicken or my absolute favourite lamb with mint sauce! Wow what a combination!!!

So there you are, my dinner consisted of roast beef, roast potatoes, broccoli, cauliflower, runner beans (growing in her garden fifteen minutes earlier) and two Yorkshire puddings and not for getting gravy made from the meat juices…………yum yum.

July 2017 046

…………… the photo below taken by me show’s mum stirring the gravy…………

July 2017 047
Mum making the gravy and Holly

…………and the photo below shows me washing up after we’ve eaten!

July 2017 050
Holly the Collie and me washing up afterwards

So a question for you, 🙂 who gets the better deal, me having a Sunday roast made for me by mum? Or mum taking her dog for a long walk down by the river, through the meadows or circling the reservoir nature reserve? Personally I think I get the better deal, mum probably thinks she does because she’s a little arthritis and Holly has boundless energy, mind you two hours exercising in the rain is heavenly fun (hmm inadvertently back to Peter)………….AND don’t forget I do the washing up! 😀

I can cook for myself, everyone should be able to feed themselves in a civilised society, however I find preparing a meal hassle after a days work, anyways I’ll finish this post on an up note, popping over to mum’s for Sunday roast is richly anticipated and sincerely appreciated once eaten!

© Andrew

Hot and steamy London (June 2017)

(18/07/2017 – I first published my June sightseeing trip to London tale several days ago, however I linked an EXTREMELY tacky YouTube video to accompany that post, call it one of those ‘seemed a good idea at the time’ ideas but in hindsight ‘that’ video  and intro was neither tasteful amusing or in the slightest bit relevant to my tale, not to worry I can put that right…….!)

Summer lady

Street_voyeur
London girl in sunny June

Britain has recently experienced it’s hottest June for 40 years, and bang in the middle of a record hot week I took the coach to Central London hoping to do a little sightseeing of my own, I hadn’t visited for several years anyways the day turned out to be a 36 degree body sweltering furnace and the sightseeing was gorgeous………..don’t get me wrong mind we’ve been waiting…. always waiting for sunny days like these.

Blue skies accompany a burning hot sun (I had to buy suntan lotion for the first time in years), searing heat like I’ve never experienced rising up from pavement stone and if you’ve read my Blog before you may have guessed this post could well be one of my sexy stories, all good fun and you’d be right! So without further ado I’ll let you into a little secret, when temperatures rise in the United Kingdom so the English public change into their summer dress ESPECIALLY the ladies, actually if mind serves me right it’s written into legislation!!!

The reason why is simple to explain, there’s both the novelty summer’s finally arrived and we know for sure it won’t last long consequently British women throw all modesty and caution to the wind, you’ve heard the phrase stir-crazy well I’ve coined days like these as sun-crazy, dress hems get shorter, bras are discarded, tee shirts tighter and bustier and for a brief couple of days a year I don’t recognise the Country I’m living in. ❤

Lol you want an example? ………..Ok if I’m pushed, there I am waiting to buy a ticket at London Embankment Underground station, packed with commuters jostling for escalators important places to go and as you do I join a queue of people waiting to buy a train ticket, then my eyes clock a young lady with long blonde hair wearing a dairy cream coloured skirt white crotchet top and no bra!……………, Hmm all very observant of you Andrew! :/

So I’m watching this attractive young lady purchasing her Oyster Card ticket, arm raised above her head pressing coins down a slot and what do I see below her armpit? A gaping looping hole in her top that’s what I see! A wardrobe malfunction revealing her perky pink boob with nipple, common I couldn’t make this sh*t up and even MORE bizarre standing behind her is a policeman wearing a Kevlar chest guard wielding his machine gun.

Then I followed her NO!!!! …………. Bless her, she’s only young once and looked fabulous!

Now jump forward two hours and I’m wandering through Hyde Park making my way towards Buckingham Palace and my ‘attention’s’ drawn to a group of young women sunbathing in bikinis, Central London for heavens sake! 😀 , later still I buy a refreshing ice lolly (£2.75 ffs) and three young women hip sway past me wearing the tightest of tops no bras and nipples like Scammell wheel nuts, there are micro-skirts hot-pants crop-tops and bare legs as far as the eye can see…………………..a great day to be alive perhaps not so great for Andrew’s blood pressure :/

……then guess what two days later heavy black clouds roll in, temperatures drop by 15 degrees and we return to conservatively dressed British normality as if nothing ever happened. Funny old World!

© Andrew

 

 

 

 

Throwing a ball with Holly the collie Sunday.

I’m annoyed, thoroughly brassed off and extremely tired, I have just spent the last hour writing a family themed Post which after pressing preview disappeared from view, consequently all my hard work is gone lost forever!

So tonight in place of my ‘long lost masterpiece’, here’s a video I filmed Sunday afternoon and for those of you who haven’t read earlier Posts Holly is the family collie 🙂 

I’ve shared pet photos time to time on Blog Andrew, I ‘snapped’ the one below whilst staying over at my brother’s Christmas 2016……….ok that’s seven months ago but what the heck who doesn’t like doggy photos?………….And by the look of all that torn paper I think she’s just finished opening someone else’s present!!!

Holly Xmas

Incidentally you may remember Holly is a rescue dog who’d spent the early years of her life kept inside a cage, which resided in the kitchen of a Flat with NO GARDEN, frigging disgusting don’t you think? To cut a long story short she had a few problems when my mum rescued her, such as toilet training etc, BUT my mum put her straight and now she’s one of the family, the perfect pet friend……..perhaps don’t purchase a collie unless you have the time and patience to train, that’s very arrogant of me to suggest but they are highly intelligent dogs and require a lot of mental stimulation! But she’s fine now. 🙂 

Sorry the photograph from last Christmas, the video was filmed yesterday.

© Andrew

I have absolutely no idea why women wear bras?

Disclaimer. 🙂 These are the private musings of a middle aged Englishman, me Andrew, also note this Post contains NO nudity, call it my final ‘Just For Fun’ Post. (Maybe 😀 ) and please remember I have a good heart and mean no disrespect.

Two reasons for writing this evening, my Followers already understand I’m slightly obsessed with boobs well least I’m honest! Jo knows I’m currently single at present and I miss squeezing a breast :D, the second reason is I enjoy Cosmic Colette’s YouTube stream and she was kind enough reply to my Comment, even laughed, truth be known hardly any YouTuber’s reply to video comments, why? Btw I have asked permission and she is fine with my Post.

Colette’s YouTube (link left) is themed fun entertainment travelling veganism body image bullying relationships mental health and much much more 🙂

My YouTube is andschannll

I thought I’d write something a little more light hearted today after my rather sombre and serious previous 10 Downing Street posts, truth be known politics is a dirty business and I’m glad not to be a part of it…………………… then again ‘big sigh’ we are all intrinsic to politics 😦

Enough politics!

Breasts and bras!

I’ve had the question ‘Why do women wear bras’ playing on my mind this past few days, such a weird contraption dreamt up by a bridge engineer (a man) in ‘ye olde’ Victorian England, so the story goes, mind you the design resembles a suspension bridge, seems logical or maybe “fake news?”

A woman I uhmm used to be ‘friends’ with likened wearing a bra similar to ‘unprintable’, the soreness from underwire’s were truly horrendous, she was one of those girls who’d unclip her bra, give a huge sigh of relief and say “thank God that’s off! Now I can breath!” 

I don’t think the video maker Cosmic Colette would mind me sharing her YouTube video, hell I might even tell her I’m sharing her “I haven’t worn a bra in one year!” video because I enjoyed watching and seeing as I’ve commented below her videos before……

So what did you think to her video? She’s lovely (attached 😦 ) and I’ll be honest and agree I can’t understand why women wear bras, they look SO much better without one, in fact Colette’s views and opinions seem pretty compelling reasons why not to wear one!

……. and if you’re saying to yourself ‘so tell me Andrew why an earth are you so interested in bras all of a sudden?’, well think back to my post Helen’s Striptease, the moment where my middle aged neighbour Helen unclipped her bra, well the seed of a post was born there and then……….. plus I’ve gotten nothing better to do this afternoon and boobs are fabulous!

Incidentally I don’t wish to offend anyone and because I’m a perfect gentleman I’m attempting to be both serious and sensitive at the same time and certainly don’t wish to come across as condescending, call this hopefully fun and amusing.

braless22

After watching the fascinating video where the lady gives her personal reasons for going braless I decided to do a little research of my own (science fan me) and where do you go if you want to find out a fact or two? Why the internet of course, dig deep enough and it’s surprising what you might learn!!

I Googled ‘reasons not to wear a bra’ this evening and happened across research conducted at a French University, turns out a sports Doctor named Jean-Denis Rouillon spent fifteen years studying the effect bras had on 330 women aged 18-35 then came to the earth shattering conclusion bras are useless!! A bold statement if ever there was one and as you can imagine he created one hell of a worldwide Sh**storm media frenzy!

Fifteen years is a long time to research bras and their effects on boobs, a study which concentrated on understanding ladies yearly breast changes when a bra is worn regularly against never worn and his preliminary results suggested, contrary to popular belief, when a young girl wears a bra from an early age, the bra doesn’t support the chest or reduce back pain or prevent breast sagging, in-fact ‘medically, physiologically and anatomically’ breasts gain no benefit from being denied gravity………… the Professor went on to say when interviewed by French media “supported breasts get saggier over time”.

Here’s a useless piece of information for you, many years ago a lady by the name of Rachel (blonde attractive and age 25) and myself were undressing in her bedroom, a casual relationship, well without being indiscreet she was a ‘big girl’ and there we were sitting on her bed together and cometh the time she reaches around her back unclipping the strap of a rather large bra holding rather large boobs, and at the same moment her underwear garment was removed her boobs dropped ‘a mile’, that was a shock and a half I can tell you…. but don’t worry I’m NOT being disrespectful or abusive, both Rachel and her boobs looked absolutely stunning, so very feminine and sucking saggy empty boobs is wonderful……. just thought you’d be interested to know!

Where was I?

Bra research!

Returning to that French sports Doctor. According to his research, young women’s breasts were firmer, ligaments stronger, more toned due to extra breast tissue all because they never wore bras, and better news was to come, women who did NOT wear a bra experienced a 7 millimetre (that’s 0.3-inch) lift in their nipples compared with the women who wore bras……… pretty compelling research and now you’re wondering as to the reasons why?

Well according to the Doctor, he claimed bras have a way of slowing down blood circulation, which therefore reduced breast tone over time so the reasons are as simple as that! Some time after a British Doctor confirmed the research stating:

“For younger women, not wearing a bra will lead to increased collagen production and elasticity, which improves lift in a developing breast.” 

Hmm, I’m wondering whether the more mature woman, who’d worn a bra all her life, could suddenly burn her bra and get away with it? Then again do having children rubbish all his data?

One note of caution, the research team did add an important caveat stating women in the French study were not a representative of the population as a whole, which seems right and fair, mind you interesting research all the same!

:/ perhaps the more mature woman should keep her bra on!

To add further weight to the no bra argument if you write why I went braless’ into YouTube’s search engine Google will ‘so I’m told’ display hundreds of videos made by hundreds of women sharing their no bra life stories similar to Collette’s…………. what was life like before YouTube?

So ladies if you’re brave enough comment as to why you wear a bra? Support? Modesty? Attracting men or women or teenage (16+) girls or boys.

Braless 2Referring to the photo opposite, in my humble opinion going braless can be classy tasteful and yes elegant. I live in the University City of Oxford, a City of ‘year on year’ eternal youth, and every day I’ll see female ladies and students go braless :/ fine by me. However I guess for any of you ladies with exposure on the mind  I’d agree with you braless, for obvious reasons, does attract a little more attention, but having said that if more women threw their bras in the bin then both men and women from my parent’s generation might say “what’s all the fuss about?”

So you are maybe asking “what conclusions have you drawn Andrew?” 🙂 None at all except ladies be yourselves, if you like to wear bras ‘wear’, if you prefer not to wear bras ‘don’t’, it’s all good to me………….. but I prefer the ‘don’t wear’ simply because a lady’s natural profile is more feminine flattering and beautiful.

Please comment? Hmm should I stop these ‘amusing’ types of posts and please remember I have a good heart and mean no disrespect 🙂

© Andrew

10 Downing Street a personal view (pt2)

I Follow an American blogger (a poetess who incidentally doesn’t follow me 🙂 ) and she wouldn’t mind me saying I loved reading her most recent post, briefly the lady shared photographs of her family’s recent vacation to London, after all the terror news it’s great to hear tourists have enjoyed our great Capital City, lightened my heart 🙂

Continued from part one………. Click Here 🙂

 

I have a certain amount of respect for Richard Nixon, yes you did read that correctly, although I enjoy reading and discussing politics as a general rule I’m extremely careful when commenting on another Countries governance for the simple reason both a naivety and ill informed opinion could get me into a lot of hot water, especially if I’m patently wrong, however I will discuss political issues with people I respect and trust…….. such as a lady named K. from America.

😀 perhaps Nixon’s photograph alongside mine affects my judgement!.

And yes for fear of repeating myself I did say I have a certain amount of respect for Nixon, yes he was a flawed paranoid man and I wouldn’t buy a used car from him but I’ve seen the superb Anthony Hopkins movie, I’ve read ‘All The Presidents Men’ several times, the Hoffman Redford movie twenty times and watched the spine tingling Nixon Frost interviews notably the “I wish to apologise to the American people!!” But you do have to give him credit for his brave China visit, a triumph of friendship and diplomacy, a message to Donald Trump politics is the art of the possible!!!………….and perhaps the success of Nixon’s visit to China is the overriding reason both superpowers have coexisted peacefully for nigh on forty years?

queen-coach
Donald, Trump and our Queen riding down the Mall together?

……. and further still I don’t remember Nixon being labelled a misogynist racist pig two appalling and disgusting character traits Trump seems to unforgivably possess when tweeting, so when he visits Britain this autumn, sits alongside the Queen in her golden carriage riding down the Mall, you can forget all talk of trade deals he just wants to parade with our Monarch and I hope he enjoys himself. (Hint of sarcasm there!)

However I’m worried he won’t be accepted with the same warm reception every other US President has received……………… I fear riots, bombings and political unrest as we’ve NEVER witnessed before…….. already the Mayor of London Sadiq Khan has publically stated he won’t shake Trump’s hand, he will he’s a politician!…….. Hopefully the visit ends peacefully.

Time to continue with my Downing Street post before I have you unfollowing in droves, I’d like to suggest the photograph of Mark above remains relevant to a Britain of present day, WE two are more than just boys standing either side of a ‘bobby’ Policeman outside 10 Downing Street, the very heart of Political power, for that brief moment in time Mark and myself have a direct physical connection with the very centre of British Democracy ………the fact we are no longer permitted to walk up Downing Street is in my opinion a freedom lost, one example of how my Country has changed for the worse.

Police holding weapons is an unnerving sight in the UK and to be truthful I’m not totally comfortable with guns in open view, but times have changed so I’ll have to get used to it. If you look to the far right beyond the black and yellow striped ramp you can just about make out Prime Minister Theresa May’s official residence and the Chancellor of the Exchequers next door at No 11.

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2017 and this’ll be the closest I’d get to number 10, we walked up there!

You’ll understand after recent horrific atrocities London is now in a state of security lockdown, walking the City’s streets are a little more worrying, my discoloured childhood photograph is one small example of how Islamic terror has changed the way we British live our lives, no longer permitted to visit important places now deemed a security risk. But people adapt to troubled times, we’ll be OK, sixty years ago German bombs were raining down upon London and we survived, Democracy stood up to Nazism and won.

Each one of us understands that at any given time, God forbid a guy could drive a white van along Westminster Bridge and mount a curb into members of the public, just imagine the propaganda coup ‘IS’ would claim if a suicide bomber detonated himself outside Number 10 Downing Street, that’s why the entrance below resembles a war time fortress, gates and machine guns confront you but Wednesday last as I walked through HorseGuards along Whitehall turning into Parliament Square I witnessed peaceful demonstrations, a comforting sign Britain’s Democracy is alive and well.

Here’s a ‘Free Society’ question for you, is President Trump visiting London a great idea? Or should democracy prevail and grant Trump a State visit, he’s Tweeted he wants to ride down the Mall sitting next to the Queen in her gold carriage!

We took Obama to our hearts but Trump? Riots? Bombings? F*ck!!!! ……. being as this is my blog Post perhaps I should answer the question should President Trump visit Britain later this year? I’ve given this question a great deal of thought and I’m saddened to say perhaps put off the visit for a while, ……… my apologies America.

😦

© Andrew

Gorillaz – We Got The Power

It’s been quite a while since I last posted a favourite music post, well here’s ‘Gorillaz’ playing ‘We Got The Power’ live on ‘The Graham Norton Show’…………the best chat show on the planet bar none!

I’m an engineer by trade, a toolmaker who used to work in a foundry as an apprentice, well ‘We Got The Power’ features a large bell cast at the Whitechapel bronze foundry, alas the factory is no more having been closed a few years and incidentally they cast the United States Liberty Bell.

Two reasons for sharing, I love the song, I’m singing it to myself all day long and I think Jehnny Beth from post punk band ‘The Savages’ is gorgeous…………..such a sexy woman and fabulous singer ❤ . Enjoy

I don’t think I need to explain who Damon Alban and virtual band Gorillaz are and that this track is from their new album……. you already know that 🙂

(“We Got the Power” is a song by alternative rock virtual band Gorillaz, featuring Jehnny Beth of British post-punk band Savages and backing vocals from former Oasis guitarist and songwriter Noel Gallagher and American rapper D.R.A.M., who also appears on the group’s single “Andromeda”. The song was released on 23 March 2017. It was released as the second single from their fifth studio album Humanz) courtesy of Wikipedia.

‘Helen’s Striptease’ an old story ‘polished!’

After two years of ‘writing’ on WordPress some readers may possibly be aware I have no common single theme on Blog Andrew but I’ve always published with one aim and that is if at least one person enjoys reading whether that be photographs, a silly tale or even a cookery lesson then I’m happy and certainly don’t wish for awards and recognition. (As if 😀 )

Further still over the course of those two years I haven’t reblogged a previous Post which some will be thankful for! However for the first time I’m going to re publish a personal favourite in hope that people enjoy, the incident lol happened a good while ago and has been rewritten in part and this time I’ll be more truthful and say, judge me if you will, but this happened…………… anyways it’s my blog and all that so I’ll post again 😀

But beware this tale won’t be to everyone’s taste. ❤ ……….. and the next will be different again.Voyeur 4

voyeur-1rhona_mitra-hollow_man
Google image…….a movie still I think?

‘Where to begin? I’ll set the scene that’s a good place to start…………… One evening a good few years ago I was peeking through my slightly parted bedroom curtains, my body propped up against the window sill gazing out across the fields which lay behind the house opposite, tonight I was watching a truly spectacular thunder and lightening display, this evening I was privileged to witnessing mother nature’s awe inspiring power, raw unbridled magnificent energy, every few minutes I felt my house shake after loud claps of thunder overhead, several minutes further and my eyes would be momentarily blinded by phosphorous white lightening strikes thunderstorms so very specific to English hot summers, then finally tarmac bouncing rain quenching England of all stifling heat and humidity………….. luckily the rain would stay away for a few hours longer!!!

……….. below this display of electric lightening and bedroom rocking thunder a bright light suddenly appeared from the third story room window opposite, an angled rooftop window set against grey tiles, and a white luminance so bright it woke me from my magnificent daydream, so what vision did my focusing eyes see?

There standing before me in clear close view was the silhouette of a slim auburn haired middle aged lady standing waist up behind her window sill………. I knew her to speak to as my neighbour across the Street, a lady called Helen (not really), age 45ish attractive in a yummy mummy sort of way, I fancied her of course and she’s happily married to a lovely guy but I wouldn’t say no if she asked, I’ve seen her picking up leaves in the front garden and she’s a handsome figure of a woman, a young looking sexy 45 year old, even after ‘blank’ children she still has a trim figure.

In a state of nerves and shock, my mind trying to process what the f#ck was happening over the road, I quickly ran and rummaged through a draw for my binoculars, God knows how I didn’t break my neck on the laminate flooring, then quick as a flash I regained my position and with hands shaking drew the lenses to my eyes. I can remember clearly the moment Helen’s bright window appeared, crystal clear and pin sharp, a vision so close now I could make out expressions on her face and the room within, my heart pounding catching my breath I propped my elbows on the sill and watched!!!!! I’d seen breasts down blouses before, by chance mind, but now I was a proper voyeur lol.

I’ve seen and chatted to Helen many times before but seeing her tonight was a whole lot different, I assumed this was her spare room but I’ve no idea it being situated above my eye line and set well back behind Street’s view, no one but me could see Helen and she was safe in the knowledge I wouldn’t be watching however I was, all very Hitchcock’s Rear Window! Well tonight for  25 minutes or so she went about her homely duties, mainly carrying bundles of clothes around the room, folding sheets, putting clean washing in draws? Who knows, just understand Helen was busy and I’m excited, both engrossed and fascinated I watched as she’d paused time to time under the apex of this small cramped space, stopping aside the smallish square open window, blind open, visible waist up, me watching….incredible!

Each time Helen paused her domestic routine I could see she was wearing a skin tight yellow tee shirt so visibly figure hugging I made out the profile of her bosom but the height of the window meant I could see no lower. Observing her was enough and I wasn’t masturbating, she looked so lovely against this bright white light, still calm and deep in thought a side of her I’d never witnessed, a lovely lady and I fancied her AND yes I agree with you I was invading her privacy! :/

Well after a few minutes of innocent voyeurism all the more exciting because the female recipient was unaware, she paused again and did something so shocking I remember swallowing hard and the binoculars trembling, Helen suddenly pulled up her shirt from the waist moving her arms skywards stripping off the garment over her head, then she held it up to the light (not window) looked at it then folded and threw to her side, at this point I was totally stunned, gobsmacked, omg I couldn’t believe I was actually watching her undress for the first and only time in my life! Jesus a performance like this only really happens in filthy novels and artistic movies. To say I was amazed is a frigging understatement, my mind was alive, my heart was pounding, the tip of my penis quivering, the lady opposite was wearing only a pretty white bra set against her pink naked body, Helen’s gorgeous and I’m partial to naturel small breasts. 

Seconds later she reached her arms behind her back, unclipped her bra allowing the white straps to glide down her arms before again tossing the undergarment to her side, minutes ago I’d been watching the approaching soon to be thunderstorm peeking through curtains, and by pure glorious coincidence I now see an illuminated nude like painting of the lady opposite near completely naked and all with my binocular lens centred on her perfect small pert breasts, her pink skin and auburn hair. Nothing below mind but I didn’t care, tonight I was a voyeur intimately watching my neighbour Helen undress and in hindsight I’m at a loss as to why I didn’t faint or have a heart attack. Unbelievable! Incredible! Beautiful! OMFG!!!! Voyeurism is wrong but by God forbidden fruit tastes sweet.

Throughout this striptease performance I’d asked myself ‘what’s she looking at her gaze fixed on something across the room?’ She’d been alone, was it a mirror or picture and I could sense Helen’s mind is distracted by something, then she startled me, she stretched an arm straight up in the air and proceeded to move her other hand below the armpit gently smoothing the palm against her skin, methodically caressing in circling motions a picture of concentration etched across her face.

I should I have turned away shouldn’t I? Closed the curtains and gone back to bed! You must be f&%king joking legally it’s my window sill and the view out is mine!

Of course I kept watching.

Helen caressessed squeezed prodded her breasts with two fingers then switching hands she repeated this now obvious checking ritual beneath the other pit of her upwardly stretched arm, all the while her face a picture of serene concentration, she even held both boobs at once as if pointing squirting sprays of milk at a mirror and now I’m sure she’s looking at her reflection in a mirror opposite? Of course by now I’d worked out what she was doing, I was witness to something very private and intimate, she was examining her breasts in a time honoured womanly routine her wistful calmness so beautiful it touched my soul (true), she’d been of course feeling for changes within her breasts, I hope to God there were none and of course tonight I was a very VERY lucky man.

So a question to any ladies reading and judging voyeur Andrew, remember that definition, I ask if you happened to be watching a neighbour strip naked then feel squeeze examine his testicles what would you do? Close the curtains? Go to bed? Or satisfy your voyeuristic appetite? Come on be honest now, no please don’t, but I have my own idea what you’d all do, one or two would be in bed long before now and the rest would have their hand down the front of their knickers doing the things girls do, remember I’m NOT a nasty man.

So how did your late night adventure end Andrew? Well her breast examinations lasted five minutes then all of a sudden something startled her, perhaps a noise from the Street below or a sudden awareness she was in-fact standing naked in her bedroom, lights on, aside an open window because tonight was so damn hot and humid, who knows? But quick as a flash she pulled a forearm across her chest covering her breasts at the same time leaning forward forcibly pulling down the blind shut!!

Performance over I caught my breath, my heart rate lowered as I climbed into bed and most amusingly of all still holding my binoculars, I woke up next morning with them! Then I slept like a baby totally utterly exhausted and btw at no point did I masturbate myself a middle aged man can only take so much excitement in one evening. Have I ever seen her undress again? NO because I never look out of my window unless there’s lightening to watch thunder to hear, in-fact that statement is absolutely true. So consequently I’ve never seen her undress again or honestly attempted to, yes even on humid warm balmy evenings because I know for fact striptease displays, a naked woman, live breast examinations are coincidences that happen once in a guys lifetime.’

So there you are, last time I published this I questioned ‘is my voyeurism a true tale or fiction? Is my incredibly vivid and erotic memory so etched across my mind only a story? I’ll allow the reader to decide’, well the evenings events as written actually happened, judge me she certainly would, fabulous and all very Jimmy Stewart in Hitchcock’s ‘Rear Window’.

Ladies I’ll leave you with one thought, be careful what you are doing late at night in your bedroom because someone might be be watching! 😀

© Andrew

Blenheim Palace, England. (Pt2)

© All Photographs taken by Andrew, all Video filmed by Andrew and Narration by Andrew. 🙂

Whilst looking back through Wednesdays photographs something rather puzzling struck me, ‘why an earth is the grass so short Andrew?’ I mean you should see my jungle of a back garden when I haven’t mown the lawn in a week, yet this Parkland resembles a golf course? All very odd must remember to Google. NOT.

As you may be aware if you ‘read’ pt1, Wednesday previous I walked around Blenheim Palace grounds taking lots of photos, incidentally that’s in Oxfordshire England. Unfortunately the video isn’t as good a quality as I’d like, never mind perhaps I should invest in a new camera or buy a new phone :/ it’s on my wish ‘list’.

So rather than ‘publish’ a part 3 blog Post here’s the remaining photographs and video (have I told you they’re all taken by me?), So if you’d like a short historical synopsis please read part 1.

(Briefly Blenheim Palace is the ancestral home of the Duke and Duchess of Marlborough built in the 1700’s with stunning ornamental grounds, and England’s Prime Minister Winston Churchill was born here.) That wasn’t tooo painful was it. 🙂

A question for you. Have you ever visited a place you know you visited as a child but forgotten about? Well my gentle walk around Blenheim estate was one of those experiences, a beautiful summers afternoon when memories of times past filtered back into my imagination all prompted by the idyllic Parkland scenery. Like the time as a ‘Boy Scout’ I gained my Woodland and Forestry badge chain sawing trees and watching birds. Happy days and according to my nephew did you know they allow girls into the Scouts now? 😀 Sounds fabulous, twelve go camping for a weekend returning with thirteen!

On another occasion I fondly remember picnicking with my parents and grandparents under a tree and my grandmother spreading out a white linen table cloth as if in her front room, picture us seven drinking tea from fine china cups (with saucers), an ‘Alice in Wonderland’ tea party laid out on a forest floor all very surreal but at the same time wonderful! :/ The only trouble is the older you get the more times you’re struck by these rather depressing deja vu.

 

A very warm July day! But Mustn’t complain this is England after all.

The following is a 4 photograph panorama. (Moving left-right)

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Blenheim Palace July 2017 pan7

Blenheim Palace July 2017 pan8

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The lake in front of the Palace has many types of wildfowl take this swan with signet below.

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© Andrew 🙂

 

Blenheim Palace, England. (Pt1)

© All Photographs taken by Andrew, all Video filmed by Andrew and Narration by Andrew. 🙂

Just so as don’t think these are old photos out of my album, they’re taken 05/07/2017

Video taken looking down toward the Lake (not the best video camera ever but no matter!)

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Blenheim Palace, Oxfordshire. England. 05/07/2015

If you’ve followed my ‘blog’ for any length of time, thank you btw, you’ll know my uploads tend to be ‘all over the place’……….. low boredom threshold? Anyways no harm done, todays Post was intended to be my recent visit to Downing Street London part 2, lol it’ll have to wait! After I woke up this morning, I opened the bedroom curtains the sun was shining the sky was blue so I visited Blenheim Palace (County of Oxfordshire,) and incidentally the videos I filmed are uploaded onto YouTube.

You’re all busy people so I’ll keep the text brief, be honest when we want to find out factual and historical information we go straight to Wikipedia, so click on the link here (‘yawn’ lol bet you didn’t bother neither did I 😀 )

A quick Synopsis: Blenheim Palace is the home to the Duke and Duchess of Malborough, was built early 1700’s and is a World Heritage Site, another interesting fact Winston Churchill PM was born and raised here. The Palace and Grounds are one of the largest in Great Britain and getting in the house costs £24 to look inside, I didn’t, blow that for a game of soldiers!

Possibly the ONE important piece of information you need to know is the lake and bridge situated in front of the Palace are completely man made being designed by the famous landscape architect Capability Brown………. a name to remember!

Imagine Capability like this, when you all landscape your own back gardens installing a nature pond, planting flowers well Capability Brown did the same with Blenheim Palace Grounds but on a much larger scale! The panoramic landscape you are looking at in my photos was completely man made, before the Palace existed the landscape was flat agricultural farm land………interesting fact don’t you think?

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Panoramic right-left of Blenheim Palace Grounds – 1
Blenheim Palace July 2017 pan2
Panorama 2
Blenheim Palace July 2017 pan3
Panorama 3
Blenheim Palace July 2017 pan4
Panorama 4
Blenheim Palace July 2017 pan5
Panorama 5
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Blenheim Palace and Parkland map is borrowed!

Well I hope you enjoyed looking at them, there is a part 2 there’s also the Downing Street follow up ………. and there are loads more pictures and video of Blenheim.

Andrew 🙂

 

10 Downing Street a personal view (pt1)

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Andrew (left) and my brother Mark standing outside number 10 Downing Street, London.

Remember the days when a British ‘Bobby’ didn’t have to carry an automatic weapon, in 2017 he’ll have one hand tightly gripping a gun barrel and the other trigger finger ready!!!

At the time this photo was taken Mark and I were still quite young children and if you read ‘A happy childhood’ you’ll recall my father had little time off from his chosen employment, so in place of fixed holidays my mother would take us boys on day trips instead, don’t go all tearful on me, there were no week long holidays in theme Parks or overseas sandy beaches to build sand castles on (I’m joking) but that’s ok, isn’t a happy childhood all about life experiences just as much as expensive holidays in exotic Countries?

Usually travelling by train we’d visit places of interest often educational, other days the three of us would cycle Oxfordshire’s country lanes with a picnic for lunch, all lol very Enid Blyton………. perhaps Google her name the lady’s a famous writer of childhood fiction much criticised and frowned upon these days for political correctness reasons, unfairly in my opinion, I enjoyed the youngster’s scrapes and adventures in a picture book 1950’s England that never was.

I love the picture of Richard Nixon. 

Where was I? Yes, mum would take us on day trips to places of interest and this particular day we three travelled by train to London visiting attractions like Buckingham Palace, The Tower of London, incidentally the day that picture above was taken, us in our smart brown anoraks, London was a new adventure being our first time in such an historic City………..

……..and yes of course we two are standing in front of 10 Downing Street the iconic home of British Prime Minister’s with a Policeman always at the door.

I say iconic because whichever Country you come from you’ll recognise that shiny black door with white lettering, and American readers will be naming their five US Presidents all standing next to PMs of their day. They are of course Presidents Nixon, Reagan, Bush Senior, Bush Junior, Obama and not forgetting our own heroic Winston Churchill PM.

To think I’m standing exactly in the foot steps of probably the most powerful man of his time, Richard Nixon! Wow, even all these years later I find my discoloured fragile photo quite awe inspiring……………….. and certainly NOT photo shopped!!!

So there you are, yet ANOTHER treasured family photograph and for those of you who’ve read the odd family post of mine you’ll be aware I’ve shared many special snapshots, incidentally my most liked and commented posts.

HOWEVER times have changed, I visited London a few weeks ago knowing the City would look very different after the many recent atrocities 😦 threats of Islamic terrorism are the reason 10 Downing Street now resembles the fortress below, no longer would I be Free to wander up and stand in front of that iconic black door so my mum could take a family photograph, a UK citizen’s right now gone forever!

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Entrance to 10 Downing Street 2017

(To be continued)

© Andrew